When we were planning our wedding, it wasn't hard. Our main goal was that everyone had a BLAST. We wanted people to dance. And crack up laughing. And just freaking have a great time. And when your focus is clear, everything heads in the right direction.
I remember vividly going to pick out our cake. And we were only going to pick out a cake because it was included in the price of the venue.
We showed up on a Saturday morning at 9am. The lady who was going to help us wasn't there yet. She was about 5 minutes late. We looked through a book, pointed to something that looked good, Tony took a few sample bites of cake, picked something out - done. It took us about 4 minutes to pick out a cake that we wanted.
We stood up to leave and the lady said "Wait - I have more books for you to look through." And I thought to myself, "Why? It's a cake."
Because all it was was a freaking cake. This was a wedding we were planning. Not a marriage. Marriage has nothing to do with freaking cake. We were only picking out a cake because it came with the price. If we had it our way, we would have picked flan. Or arroz con leche. But we didn't have much money and our parents were helping us with the wedding. So cake it was. And it didn't freaking matter.
So we are now saving. Because next year is our tenth wedding anniversary. And we don't want cake.
We want freaking flan.
And we want to have a dinner with people at our favorite restaurant - Phlight.
It's kind of scary to put it down on paper. Your goals. But we're doing it.
We want an awesome dinner with awesome food. We want a babysitter at our house to watch children. We want to go to karaoke after to sing and crack up.
See, it's not about cake.
It's about serving others. We wanted other people to have a freaking blast at our wedding. We wanted to watch people have a grand ol' time. We had so many people come up to us to say "this is the best wedding ever!" Because that's what it was - a wedding. Not a freaking marriage.
Marriage is all about doing stuff for the other person. That's it. It's not "what can I get from this? what can I gain? How 'come he's not doing x, y, z?" Just stop. Just freaking stop.
Sometimes I have to tell myself to stop.
It's "What can I do for Tony?" What can I do to make sure he wants to come home to me EVERY SINGLE DAY?
Because I can be annoying. I can be cray cray.
I am a sinner.
But I love him, I do. I want him to be with me FOREVER.
And I will save and save and save to have a dinner where we give back to the people who are our family and friends and rocks.
We want to give a dinner to those who are part of our clan.
We are the Duals. The fab freaking Duals. And we want to share our tenth anniversary the way we feel is best.
Because at the end of the day, it's not what I get that matters, right?
It's the freaking flan :)
See ya'll next year folks.
-Emily
